Name:Ken, like the doll Country:United States State:Nevada Metro:Las Vegas Birthday:12/30/1982 Gender:Male
Interests:Making new strides in the area of love making Expertise:Being a full fledged Sex Cowboy Occupation:Professor of Awesomology Industry:Ass Kickery
Mi Hermano: Did I send you this link? http://www.joystiq.com/2008/01/17/video-games-live-announces-40-shows-across-the-globe/ El Sex Cowboy: no, that is dope though El Sex Cowboy: At first I thought the link was about the starcraft championships the other day Mi Hermano: Yeah. Showed Ed and Alicia last night. El Sex Cowboy: that ish was streamed live from some arena in korea Mi Hermano: Starcraft championships? El Sex Cowboy: those koreans love their starcraft El Sex Cowboy: yah Mi Hermano: Really. Mi Hermano: Koreans are Korazy. El Sex Cowboy: they have like two gaming channels in korea Mi Hermano: Nice. El Sex Cowboy: and starcraft is like a national sport or something El Sex Cowboy: there was some uber starcraft player El Sex Cowboy: and he got drafted cuz they have to serve some time in the military over there El Sex Cowboy: so the army formed a starcraft team with this dude Mi Hermano: Nice. El Sex Cowboy: and they actually won when they went to the championships! Mi Hermano: Must build up the morale. El Sex Cowboy: yah El Sex Cowboy: dude El Sex Cowboy: I was thinking about buying a keytar Mi Hermano: Sup? Mi Hermano: Nice. Mi Hermano: You totally should. El Sex Cowboy: okey doke El Sex Cowboy: I just wanted your opinion Mi Hermano: Then you could rush the stage at VGL and play along. El Sex Cowboy: oh snap, they're pretty close to my place too El Sex Cowboy: I'll probly hit this up Mi Hermano: Actually, you should just travel the country, helping people with your keytar El Sex Cowboy: WITH MY KEYTAR El Sex Cowboy: hahahaha, like that dude on rob and big Mi Hermano: I don't think I saw that one. El Sex Cowboy: well, he didn't use a keytar El Sex Cowboy: he just traveled the country in an ice cream truck El Sex Cowboy: and gave out free ice cream! Mi Hermano: Didn't see that one. Mi Hermano: That's so damn cool. El Sex Cowboy: it is Mi Hermano: Why the hell didn't he ever come around us? El Sex Cowboy: heck if I know Mi Hermano: Do you know how to play a keytar? Mi Hermano: Does anyone give keytar lessons? El Sex Cowboy: no El Sex Cowboy: I think I can teach myself Mi Hermano: Nice. Mi Hermano: You should bring it to Christmas and all the family gatherings. Mi Hermano: Actually, you should just bring it everywhere. Forever. El Sex Cowboy: yes Mi Hermano: Like a samurai and his sword. El Sex Cowboy: I'll be like a vf character Mi Hermano: You and your keytar. Mi Hermano: Yeah. El Sex Cowboy: random item El Sex Cowboy: and a funky hat Mi Hermano: Except better because you'll be real. El Sex Cowboy: It'll be dope El Sex Cowboy: then I can throw anyone as long as their move has a recovery of 8 frames or more El Sex Cowboy: *geek* Mi Hermano: Actually, after you beat someone at something you should bust a pose and play a song. El Sex Cowboy: but yah, I'm definitely contemplating it El Sex Cowboy: I'm gonna go to a music store today to see how much one is Mi Hermano: Google? El Sex Cowboy: there's a music store close, I'd rather hit that Mi Hermano: Do they sell keytars there? El Sex Cowboy: probly Mi Hermano: Are they still available? El Sex Cowboy: it's one of them sam something rather stores El Sex Cowboy: not sam goody El Sex Cowboy: the other music store that sells instruments Mi Hermano: Okay. Mi Hermano: Sam Ash. Mi Hermano: Dude, do you really think they're going to have it there? El Sex Cowboy: Don't know El Sex Cowboy: if they don't I'm gonna ask them where I can find one in town Mi Hermano: Okay. El Sex Cowboy: I'm really down for this keytar Mi Hermano: For the irony? El Sex Cowboy: I thought to myself "I got a ton of dumb shit in my apartment" El Sex Cowboy: "But I'm missing something" El Sex Cowboy: Then I watched the 90210 season 3 dvd, and one of the eps had a keytar El Sex Cowboy: It was a vision Mi Hermano: Nice. El Sex Cowboy: Yes El Sex Cowboy: I wonder what colors I can get it in... Mi Hermano: I wonder how hard it's going to be to find one. Mi Hermano: I just went on wikipedia: There are few models of keytars currently produced. Yamaha was once well-known as a keytar manufacturer. Roland's AX-7 was produced from 2002 until early 2007. Williams makes the V-2 keytar, but it is significantly different than what is traditionally considered a keytar, instead looking more like a guitar which happens to have a keyboard on it. Mi Hermano: Anyways, good luck and go with God on this one. Later, man.
Turns out my brother was right. This will be much more difficult than I had initially expected. Wish me luck.
Sure, he mighta gotten some help here and there, but I'm more than willing to give anyone who drinks shit water a pass.
And stop talkin' shit about his advice. If I really wanted to watch a tv show about survival I'd watch a show about some guy completely avoiding the woods/rain forest/swamp/glacier/mountains/desert/jungle.
Around midnight last night, I rolled up to the beautiful Green Valley Ranch resort and casino and for some odd reason there was a girl outside of the south entrance jumping rope. I suppose that it's not all that strange by itself, but what really put her over the top was that when I left at 3, HOMECHICK WAS STILL THERE JUMPING ROPE. (I also had a friend confirm this girl's existence, so it wasn't the alcohol playing tricks on me)
Now, I've been known to jog a couple of miles at night, so I'm not exactly one to talk. But:
1) I've never gone jogging on a Saturday night at midnight (latest I've ever done was 11) 2) I've never done laps around a casino 3) I've never jogged until 3 in the morning
Ever since then, I've been quite intrigued as to exactly why someone would jump rope for (at least) 3 hours outside of a casino on a Saturday night. I've come up with the following possibilities:
1) She has body image issues (this one seems to be the likeliest possibility) 2) She is, in fact, a spirit stuck between the living world and the afterlife (I didn't actually talk to her or even touch her, so it's possible) 3) She subscribes to some particular superstition that states that if she jump ropes for a certain amount of time, in a certain location, on a certain night, she'll be granted a wish (I really hope this is the one, and I really hope she gets her wish)
I'm gonna go back next Saturday and see if she's there again. If she is, I'll let you fine folks know what's up.
It's summer, it's hot, and Bob Barker's out so there's nothing to watch anymore. As such, you could all use some mental stimulation.
=Confessions of a Sex Cowboy VI=
1) El Sex Cowboy's top 5 celebrity crushes (in no particular order)
(Uno) Julianne Hough
Soo-wee. There was apparently a great deal of controversy over how hot their dances were, but I really don't see the big deal. You guys probably don't know this, but me and Apolo are homies. He let me in on what happened:
El Sex Cowboy: Yo, so why's everyone hatin'? Apolo: Shee-it, I don't know. I couldn't care less, though. El Sex Cowboy: Oh, I know. I know. Apolo: Hahahahaha, I saw her and was like, "Hmmmmmm...." El Sex Cowboy: Hmmmm........? Apolo: I was like, "You know, our dances are missing something. They need more, umm, PASSION." El Sex Cowboy: Smooth operator over here. Apolo: You betcha.
(Dos) Emilie de Ravin
Why, those are some blue eyes you have there ma'am. Honestly, I never thought that she was that hot until I saw that episode where she was all goth'ed out and her eyes looked SUPER ridiculously blue because her hair was black and her skin was pale as all hell. Now I just think she's gorgeous.
(Tres) Misa Campo
I'm really not into the whole import model look, but eee-gadz is she purdy. I might even like her more than Leah Dizon. Okay, maybe not. But she's still drop-everything-your-doing-and-wait-on-her-hand-and-foot pretty.
(Cuatro) Laura Leighton
I always thought she was hot on Melrose Place, but she was just *rawr* on SVU a little while back.
(Cinco)
The blonde chick in blue
I really dig that song, and I always had a thing for that particular background dancer. Marissa Ramirez looked really good in that video too, but then she fell off hard on General Hospital with the dreadlocks. She really shoulda kept her hair much simpler so we could all admire how pretty she was.
2) I actually like the "Girlfriend" remix with Little Mama.
3) I often go to Cute Little Kittens, and get quite annoyed when people post pictures of non-cute kittens.
4) I find it difficult to not bid on cute Pokemon plushies on eBay. For example, this bad boy:
I haven't even played the new Pokemon, so I've not had the chance to battle with the above Pokemon and form some sort of emotional bond. BUT LOOK AT HOW DOPE THAT LOOKS!!!
Okay, so that one's outta control. I'm just glad that Lickitung finally evolved. Jesse really fucked up when she traded her Lickitung on the cartoon.
5) I'm obsessed with celebrity polar bear Knut (reference pic:
)
I actually check Spiegel Online daily to check on the latest happennings with the little guy. Or, as I like to call them, "Knut Knuws". He's getting much bigger and less cuter as the days go on, but thankfully Spiegel Online always has some great lines to make the news easier. As such:
#Tragically, his cuteness rating
is declining steadily. The white ball of fur with innocent black button
eyes that melted millions of hearts has turned into a shaggy yellow
bruiser with a long snout. He's already got four of the 42 teeth that
will one day turn him into one of the world's most fearsome land-based
predators.
Tremendous! Here's one that I came up with:
#Once the cutest animal on earth, celebrity polar bear Knut can no longer entertain his thousands of fans daily at the Berlin Zoo. This once charming cub has turned into a vicious beast that is ready to eat even the smallest of children.
6) As if this entry couldn't get any gayer, I think Satoshi Tsumabuki is a really handsome guy.
And basically every dude I know agrees with me. No homo.
7) I honestly find the Vince McMahon death angle slightly offensive, especially given how regularly people in the professional wrestling community have been dying lately.
8) I've REALLY been into beautifuls lately. For some reason, I've been running into a lot of bartenders that don't seem to know how to make them (how can you work in Vegas and not know how to make a beautiful?), and they end up giving me MONSTER beautifuls that get me insta-buzzed.
And congrats to the homie Dizzle on graduating from UCLA! If you peeps didn't know, UCLA is an excellent academic institution and is POPPIN' OFF WIT SOOPAH FINE BREEZIES. Seriously, I'm in the wrong profession. Engineering in general tends to be something of a sword-fight, and my job is no different. I need to go back to school, then become a professor or something so I don't have to be trapped in a sausage-fest for the rest of my life.
